On Grandparents Raising Grandchildren

...or in our case, helping out as much as possible with our grandson who, with his mother (our eldest daughter), lives with us.

Here is how it all came about:
We sent our daughter off to college. She had always been the "rebellious one" of our children, distant, almost impossible to reason with at times. We got the news in early 2006 that she was pregnant. It was one of those moments that seem to stretch an eternity, when I felt God watching and waiting - what will you do? For Paul and I, the only right, loving, and moral possibility was for her to continue the pregnancy and to keep the baby with the family. We promised her that we would do everything possible to allow her to continue with her hopes and dreams, while helping to raise the baby.

Adjusting:
It is a very odd thing to raise a baby again after your youngest child becomes a teenager. Interestingly enough, I did have this thought in late 2005 that I would love to have a baby again, and even briefly thought about adopting. I am quite sure that this was God's way of preparing me for my new role: A grandmother helping to raise a grandchild. The adjustment has not been easy. I have been dealing with some health issues, and it was all just such a topsy-turvy change of lifestyle. I had different plans and dreams. It made for frustration and often depression, even feeling trapped. I had to remind myself long and often about the bigger picture and that I was working for a greater good.

Nowadays:
However, in spite of the difficulties, our grandson is a complete blessing. I am so grateful that we are managing to do what we set out to do - help raise Tyler and help Julie achieve her dreams along with it. Some things that have helped are having family therapy, getting needed rest, and eating properly. Finding a new doctor that is addressing my health issues has also brightened the horizons significantly. The most wonderful change has been in Julie. The once rebellious teen is turning into a lovely young woman, a good mother, a loving daughter, a sibling who is also a friend, and a grown up. Our life has altered quite a bit. I also am needing to reassess working. As it is now, I am doing a lot of baby care while Julie works part-time. But Paul and I discussed how since I am a Registered Nurse that I could earn more in the same amount of time Julie is working, allowing her to be with her son more. We have spent time in prayer, asking for God's guidance on this issue.

The Important Thing:
It can be done. It isn't easy, but God gives us the strength. When Julie was pregnant and considering adoption, I was so dismayed. I didn't want to lose this precious family member, however lovely any adoptive family could be. Even in my most depressed times, I have never regretted our decision to keep Tyler in our family and home.

He is a blessing. Thank you God.

Without The Dark, There Is No Sunrise

Today I was in my doctor's office getting treatment. I have been down and out with a sinus infection (that finally required antibiotics), and just in general poor health. The snows in our area along with the long days of winter have also deflated me. But the doctor said that he never looks at the winter in bad terms. He feels he can't truly enjoy the spring and summer without this season of quiet and rest. He said to me, "Without the dark, there is no sunrise." This made good sense to me.

I walked home today because my daughter needed the car and dropped me off at the doctor's office. It is a somewhat long walk, but today I welcomed it. It is a comparatively warm day, with the huge snows we have had recently beginining to melt. The sun was bright. I was grateful for the sun and fresh air and exercise. My doctor had given me a hot cup of green tea to go, and I sipped it all the way home. I paused only once to look at one of my favorite home gardens along that pathway. I often walk past this neighbor's house to admire the beauty of his garden vision. Once home I soaked my feet in a hot bath.

Simple pleasures on a winter day, knowing warmth will come in its time!.

Feeding Mama Blueberries

A favorite time for Julie and Tyler:

Orderly Days - Part Two

Here is my continuation of this post where I introduced my Home Management Binder from Orderly Days (Update 10/13/08: Sadly, the website seems to be down right now. I don't know why or when it might return.). As I mentioned then, I have "tweaked" my binder to make it more useful to my particular situation. Here are some of the other things I have included in the binder:

Daily Task List from Monday

(This was placed in a Day Runner plastic protector sheet to allow use of the dry-erase markers. Tasks for morning and afternoon were completed and marked off with one of my dry-erase markers.)

Chore list "Let's Clean Up!" program

(Note that I re-wrote my inspirational quote onto nice paper with a rose next to it.)

Close-up of the chore list

The chore list is placed on the refrigerator. There are boxes to check off when a task is complete. If a chore isn't done, it can be put on the next day's list (that's where you see a number "1", indicating that the chore should have been done the previous day).

Praying the Rosary - Praying the Gospels

The Rosary is an often misunderstood prayer of the Catholic faith. What many don't realize is that the Rosary is a wonderful meditation on the Gospels. Each day the Rosary is prayed has five different mysteries to reflect on, one for each of the five decades of the Rosary:

Joyful Mysteries (Mondays and Saturdays)
- Annunciation - Obedience
- Visitation - Love for Neighbor
- Nativity - Love for the Poor
- Presentation of Jesus - Humility
- Finding of Jesus - Prayer

Sorrowful Mysteries (Tuesdays and Fridays)
- Agony in the Garden - Submission to God's Will
- Scourging at the Pillar - Loathing of our Sins
- Crowning of Thorns - Christ, the King of Our Hearts
- Christ Carries the Cross - Our Daily Crosses
- Crucifixion - Sacrifice

Luminous Mysteries (Thursdays)
- Baptism by John - Renewal of the Holy Spirit
- Wedding Feast At Cana - God's Transforming Power
- Proclamation of the Kingdom - Word of God
- Transfiguration - Christ the Light
- Institution of the Eucharist - Christ in the World

Glorious Mysteries (Wednesdays and Sundays)
- Resurrection - Overcoming evil
- Ascension - New Life
- Descent of the Holy Spirit - Ourselves as Temples of the Spirit
- Assumption of Mary - Peaceful Death
- Coronation - Glory of the Kingdom of God

I don't pray the Rosary every day, but it is a very calming and beautiful way to spend time with God on those days I do pray it. And my mother made me a beautiful Rosary when I had my First Communion as a child:

Snow Baby!

We bought Tyler his first pair of snow boots on Monday. We've had deep snows here lately and wanted him to experience it. We think Tyler misses his almost daily walks in the fresh air. So we bundled him up and ventured into the backyard. He was a little bit scared and wanted to hold our hands while walking in the drifts, which went up to above his knees. He tasted the snow and found it...interesting!

Samosas and a New Cookbook!

I got a wonderful new cookbook a while back. It is a whole grain baking book from the King Arthur Flour Company:

One of the main reasons I got is was so that I could have a recipe for whole wheat puff pastry and turnover dough. I haven't tried the puff pastry yet, but I did try the turnover dough recipe. I used it to make one of my family's favorite meals - Samosas (a traditional east Indian food). I serve them with a sauce made of garam masala and mango chutney - YUM!